5. Males Pressuring Males – A lot of our male respondents stated that the stress males felt from different males was big, when and in the event that they have been to return out and admit that they have been brazenly religious. It’s one of many key causes many males saved their spirituality quiet and near their chest. Many stated that there’s an innate competitiveness between males that shamed them into feeling ‘lower than’ and defensive for not sharing the mainstream supreme of what it’s to be ‘masculine’. And but, many ladies (in addition to myself) stated that we discovered it extraordinarily masculine when a person can brazenly share his emotions and specific his spirituality. Males stated that they’ve issue opening up when different males are round, as they have an inclination to really feel that they’ll be judged or put down. Whereas, they felt safer opening up in entrance of girls who can be extra accepting of them. Though there have been some males, who stated girls have been judgemental too and had concepts that religious males might be ‘too delicate’. Of specific be aware amongst our male respondents, is that they stated it was frequent for males to imagine that one other man is ‘effeminate’ when he exhibits or shares his religious aspect – seeing spirituality, as being ‘female’, somewhat than ‘masculine’.

6. Spirituality Seen as ‘Not Masculine’ – A lot of our male respondents agreed that males (and ladies) noticed spirituality as a female high quality and one which diminished their masculinity in a roundabout way. This utilized added weight to the explanation why males have been reluctant to brazenly share their views and experiences in religious discussions, as they feared their gender would come into query. Certainly, it’s so essential that we perceive that being open to your religious reality has nothing to do with gender (that polarises it approach an excessive amount of). Spirituality is our frequent supply and isn’t gender primarily based. Sure, we are able to specific our spirituality via the lens of femininity and/or masculinity. Every of us has entry to each of those power flows. One isn’t higher than the opposite. One isn’t extra religious. Each mix to create the entire. Certainly, the extra that we are able to see extra males brazenly sharing their spirituality whereas sustaining who they’re, of their integrity and authenticity, the better permission it offers for all males to do the identical and for ladies to additionally observe swimsuit.

7. Mixing Science and Spirituality – One other nice level from our respondents was that some males view spirituality via the lens of science. They see science because the important hall via which the religious dimension might be quantified and touched, thereby making spirituality extra accessible and acceptable to all. And thus, these males don’t are likely to share their views from a religious ‘subjective and private’ standpoint, however extra from a structured, outcomes and proof primarily based perspective.

8. Male Non secular Leaders Dominating – Most of the respondents (women and men alike) had an analogous expertise the place males that they had come throughout in religious teams or boards would try to take over – or tackle a management position, not lengthy after becoming a member of. Specifically, this could occur with males who might have been ‘new’ to the religious path, however felt that they ‘knew every thing’ after solely a short while of being uncovered to religious ideas and views. This was ‘off-putting’ to many real males (on their path for a few years) who attended religious teams, courses or workshops as a way to contribute, develop and study. They have been really ‘embarrassed’ by some males attempting to take over and dominate discussions and teachings, so quickly after becoming a member of a bunch. They stated that is what put them off from sharing an excessive amount of about their religious path publicly, as they didn’t need to be judged, as considered one of ‘these domineering males’, who try to take over – significantly when there’s a predominantly feminine viewers in attendance.

9. Males Feeling Safer to Categorical in Teams – Most of the males who responded to my put up additionally stated that they felt safer opening up in group conditions that they have been acquainted with, somewhat then doing so (maybe in a extra random approach) on-line. Whereas girls, discovered a standard bond by sharing (maybe to these they don’t even know). Males gave the impression to be a lot extra cautious, preferring to maintain quiet, till they felt they have been protected from judgment or recrimination. Once more, this seems to be as a result of they don’t need to be judged or pressurised by different males and/or girls.

10. Non secular Males and Ulterior Motives – A well-liked response was the variety of cases that males (and ladies) skilled the place males who have been brazenly ‘religious’ or maybe even ‘religious lecturers’ have been abusing their positions of belief. Many stated that males they’ve come throughout in religious courses or retreats have been solely there to meet girls, who they discovered to be straightforward targets – searching for their soul mates or religious males who understood them. Certainly, I’ve seen this occur with some males that I’ve met in religious teams and I’ve heard it taking place (quite a bit) with girls I’ve labored with in private classes. Many ladies have begun a relationship with their male religious instructor, which has been complicated to them. I’ve all the time thought that males ‘specifically’ should have nice integrity if they’re to be a religious instructor, as a result of with so many ladies on this discipline open, trusting and searching for males to narrate to on a soulful foundation, one should all the time be – above reproach.

11. Dropping Contact with Associates When Coming Out as Non secular – And eventually, the opposite frequent theme amongst many male respondents was that they discovered the religious path a lonely one, as soon as their buddies or colleagues knew about their religious path. Many felt unhappy or upset that when their buddies and/or household knew extra about who they’re that they not wished to be round them. They slowly noticed individuals from their previous transfer away and lose contact. And on the flip aspect of this, some males stated that they have been really grateful that that they had been open and trustworthy about who they’re and what they observe, because it meant they not needed to play a charade and affiliate with individuals they not resonated with. So, it may go each methods.